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Nazareth, Pa., United States

Wednesday, August 24, 2011

Angle Caused the Great East Coast Earthquake of 2011?

Eckville Press has an exclusive on the real cause of yesterday's earthquake.

"Tremors throughout the East Coast resulted when Councilman Ron Angle dropped his wallet at a local convenience store.

John Stoffa states Northamptons Emergency Management Teams will be assessing county owned buildings during the next few day for structural damage.

Mr Stoffa also states that at this time, the only damage reported was to the Gracedale Nursing Home, and crews have already been dispatched to demolish the building.

Larry the Otter and the silly guy in the dress reported, 'O'Hare will pay for this.'


16 comments:

Anonymous said...

You forgot the part of the joke where Stoffa hires an insider firm.

Anonymous said...

Did you get permission to post that pre-earthquake photograph of Nazareth High School's track?

Anonymous said...

I hope no one was injured from Ron's loose wallet.

Anonymous said...

There was a lot less change in it yesterday than last week.

Anonymous said...

Speaking of money in his wallet....

Township Inspector Tells Judge He Gave Money To Angle
by GAY ELWELL, The Morning Call | March 10, 1989
An Upper Mount Bethel Township road employee yesterday explained that he gave Supervisor Ron Angle $345 of the $870 he received from the township for inspecting driveways in 1987. William H. Godschalk said he made the payments because Angle told him other supervisors knew of the arrangement, but later found out they did not. After the other supervisors and township auditors learned of the payment, Godschalk testified, Angle visited his home to return the $345. "He said he was saving it for me," Godschalk said.

Gee do we see a pattern here?

Bernie O'Hare said...

The Gracedale Goons are busy.

Anonymous said...

Lets see... ah...

take $5 million,
then divide by $345,
carry the 1,
drop jaw to ground,
roll eyes in disgust,
and say out-loud,
"wow, that's a lot of 'gifts', he must be very a loved man."

Anonymous said...

Did operations of the Thomas Jefferson Accelerator Lab in Virginia have anything to do with the Earthquake ... Acceerators smash atoms to change them and the operations look out for unstable dark matters... Otherwize if you believe in Nordicfolf tale ... The land moved because the giant who sleeps within moved his body while a sleep for a moment

Anonymous said...

I thought the reason for the quake was that you were back jogging Bernie. But this makes for a more reasonable explanation.

Anonymous said...

If you liked that Angle story, stay tuned. There are a million of them. Most of them were furnished by former Republicaan officials.
If it involves money and something fishy, you can bet Angle is around.

Dave said...

Ron confirmed your story at the CoG picnic this evening. He said the story was relayed to him and he found it and you amusing..at times! He chuckled and that is a good sign when we can laugh at ourselves now and then. Keep up the comedy Bernie..you do it well.

Anonymous said...

Some credit to Desalva/stoffa for repairing the parking deck in tme...it might have fallen down had it not been done.

Anonymous said...

The deck was only 100% over budget. Another accomplishment from the Adminstration that can't manage straight.

Bernie O'Hare said...

Very good point, and one I completely overlooked.

Anonymous said...

Well, tack on another $450,000+ to the judgment. Maybe a debt clock should be set up.

Prompts the question: Why do bad things always seem to happen to good people?

Anonymous said...

Angle says that decision, which he will appeal, is a travesty engineered by his political opponents and a judge he says has strong Democratic connections. "This is the most loony decision and most bizarre case," he told me.

Attack the competence of the judge and use one of your pet phrases to describe whatever doesnt fit into your alternate universe world view.

And the kicker? Joe Long democrats at it again. Its amazing what power they wield.

Like a child Angle blames everyone for his plight other than himself and his own behavior.

What's the tote board of the judgment amount today?